Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
