Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
