I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Dignity is for republicans.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Randomize