They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
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