told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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