lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
