Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize