There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
