You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
