Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize
