At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize
