There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Randomize
