Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Randomize
