She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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