I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
