But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
