You smell like stripper and shame
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
party gras won. party gras always wins.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Randomize