are you still at the devil's house?
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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