butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i wish my penis had a tongue
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
