When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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