after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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