Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize