If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
