I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Randomize
