Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
