ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
