Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
