Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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