Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
