erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
