Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Randomize
