I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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