so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Randomize