now i know why i became what i already was.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
