She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
