Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
