dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Randomize
