playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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