It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
