8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
he thought i was a dude.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
We left the knife in your bed.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
