Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
