Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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