i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
