yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
