he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
