hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Randomize
