the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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