Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
