Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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