we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
