absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
